Here’s the news from our guest blogger, the intrepid life-journeywoman Lillian Hunter:
I’ve been feeling just plain sad these days. There have been a lot of serious changes in my life, and I know that a lot of the sadness is just the process of grieving over my losses. That seems to me to be a legitimate type of unhappiness.
But this cloud of sadness has been spreading and morphing into self-pity and general unhappiness with my life. I think of it as an emotional temper tantrum. I started to get angry about everything and at everyone. I ended up in a very dark place. I’ve done this before, of course, but I’m tired of it.
Have you ever noticed that most unhappiness stems from wishing things were other than they are? We wish a spouse, partner, child, parent, employer, co-worker, job, house, or bank account was something other than what it is. We almost can’t help ourselves when it comes to material things, because we are constantly bombarded with advertisements and messages that we need more, bigger, and better material things. I think that attitude has spilled over into our relationships, employment, and other aspects of our lives. Wishing things were other than what they are is an illegitimate form of unhappiness.
So I stopped wishing and complaining. I reminded myself that it’s good to accept things and people as they are. That doesn’t mean I don’t want some changes in the future. It is a totally present state of mind. I accept everything as it is, and I do it gladly. This includes me and where I am in my life.
Funny thing–positive changes happen when I gladly accept things as they are. For starters, I get along better with the people in my life and I am much happier. Imagine that!