Top 3 Do-Over! Mistakes
It’s so exciting to see women reinventing themselves with a frequency and intensity that our mothers’ generation would never have imagined. But it’s still a challenge to take a Do-Over! in any part of your life. If you’re in the process, here are the top 3 mistakes I see when I am coaching women-in-transition:
1. Poor Planning: You can’t wing a Do-Over! Big or small, it needs to be thought-through ahead of time with at least the same precision as you plan a meal (think Julia Child). Not only do you need to consider the pragmatics of change, but you also need to consider how you will handle the push-back you’re likely to get from your family, friends, or co-workers.
2. Confused Purpose: Wouldn’t it be lovely if we all had a big idea for changing the world and started our own non-profit to implement it? But the reality is, not everyone has to change the world. Purpose isn’t just about doing something. It’s also about being something. As Victor Frankl argued, we can endow our lives with meaning by merely accepting our circumstances with dignity. Meaning isn’t something we find; it’s something we make. Frankl outlined four ways that we can give our lives meaning: accomplishment, love, nature, art/culture. Or, if you follow Joseph Campbell’s way of looking at life, it’s about feeling alive. So don’t insist on finding a grand purpose that isn’t yours because you think you “should.” Make it authentic.
3. Insufficient Passion: Similarly, you’ve got to find what’s really yours to love, even if the rest of the world doesn’t value it. No one gave a hoot about French cooking in America before Julia Child decided to share her passion for it. A Do-Over! challenges us to the core, so you need to have passion in abundance to get through the rough patches.
Tell me, what have been your biggest Do-Over! challenges? Make a comment below.