May 2011 Archives

Dear Ann,

I need your advice about how to start the conversation about getting a raise at work. I was recently reassigned, and that has increased my workload and requires way more of my time. I feel like I am doing more work, and I am not being compensated well. Add to that, I personally know that my colleagues (who have less responsibility than I do) get paid more money. Please help, what do I do?

Yolanda L.

Dear Yolanda,

Your situation brings me back! I faced the same situation in my first job after finishing my PhD coursework at New York University, before starting on my dissertation. I took a job as editor of a trade magazine, to start paying off those student loans. I enjoyed the work; it didn't pay very well, but nothing in journalism ever did. Then one day I found out that the worthless advertising guy, fresh out of college, who spent most of his day gossiping his way from desk to desk, made more money than I! At that very moment, I left work for the day, stopped at the drugstore downstairs to buy a notebook, and went to the research library to begin my dissertation.

But I bet you'd rather get a raise.

First, let me shout, "Hooray!" You know your worth, and you're not willing to settle for being de-valued, and maybe even exploited. If more women had your chutzpah, we'd be making more than 77 cents on every dollar earned by our male counterparts.

But I bet you're rather hear how to get that raise.

Okay, so here's how to build a winning campaign:

1. Take time to wind down your emotions. Give yourself enough time to cycle through whatever anger or frustration you may be feeling. Those emotions are absolutely valid and deserve to be honored (in private!), but they will only get in the way of planning and executing your campaign. Research, strategy, and action require a clear head.

2. Read up. Specifically, take a look at Ask for It: How Women Can Use the Power of Negotiation to Get What They Really Want, a terrific how-to manual by Linda Babcock and Sara Laschever. Not only will it provide you with a broader perspective on your situation, it will also give you detailed, concrete advice about how to rehearse your negotiating skills before the "big ask."

3. Do your research. Gather credible evidence about comparative salaries to your own title: 1. within your organization, 2. at your company's close competitors, and 3. industry-wide. Anecdotal information from friends and colleagues doesn't count. You need to be able to unequivocally document for your boss from unimpeachable sources how your salary compares with those of your peers. Also, this will communicate to your boss that you're serious, and won't be appeased by sweet talk or vague claims.

4. Quantify your contributions to the organization. This may be the most important, and challenging, step in the process. How can you demonstrate your worth to the organization--in the terms that are meaningful to the organization? In other words, how does your boss measure your contributions to the bottom line of the business? Those are the metrics you need to use. That may mean things such as: number of clients, percentage of sales, reduction in costs, size of projects, completion time, etc. In other words, find a way to measure your value to the company. (And, BTW, from now on you should be calculating these metrics on a monthly, quarterly, and annual basis. That way, you will be able to articulate your value to the organization on a moment's notice!)

5. Time it right. How and when are raises and promotions decided at your office? Is there a specific time of the year, and a prescribed process? Or do they happen on a rolling basis? Depending upon that schedule, time your conversation with your boss accordingly. If that time is still six months out, you can still schedule a discussion with your boss, presenting your case and asking what more you need to do in the next six months to meet the criteria for the raise or promotion. Bosses never like to be surprised, so letting her know in advance that you have a goal gives you an advantage.

6. Make your case. Set up a formal meeting with your boss, and let her know ahead of time what's on your agenda. Once there, state what salary you think is appropriate, and tell her why, in terms of comparative salaries for your title and in terms of your contributions to the organization. Conclude by restating what salary you think accurately reflects your contributions, and ask for her response. Don't argue, or get defensive. Use questions as a way to probe for more information without appearing "pushy." Ask for clarifications and specifics. For example: "I understand that there is no money for salary increases right now. When should I check back with you?" Or: "I understand that you want me to improve my skills. Can you tell me specifically which areas I need to improve, and to what level?") As you leave, make a statement that sums up what you understand as the outcome, and ask if you've got it right. An informal followup email reiterating the agreement and any next steps will keep your request in play.

7. Update your resume. If the organization doesn't respond positively to the case you make, it may be time to leave. Sometimes (and especially for young women) you may need to join a different organization in order to be taken seriously as someone more valuable than the new young thing who landed in the office at the entry level. Their loss.

The more dispassionate you can be, the more confident and powerful your request will be. At best, your boss will apologize for the gross oversight and rectify it immediately. At worst, you'll be that much better at negotiating your starting salary with your next employer.

Practically everyone knows at least something about Isadora Duncan. Probably not that she read Plato or that she considered her development of successive movement a significant artistic achievement. More likely, they know that she died in a sports car, her neck snapped by her own trailing scarf. Or that she was one of the original 'liberated' women. Or that Vanessa Redgrave played her in the movie.

Isadora would turn 137 this month! She actually didn't make it past age 50, but her spirit lives on . . . at Bookwoman bookstore (5501 N Lamar), 7pm on Thursday, May 26. That's when we'll be celebrating her birthday, in Isadorable style. Wear your favorite scarf! (That photo is from our last Isadora birthday bash.)

An Isadora sampler:

'If my art is symbolic of any one thing, it is symbolic of the freedom of woman and her emancipation from hidebound conventions.'

'Life is an experience, an adventure. It is an expression.'

'I preach freedom of the mind through freedom of the body: women, for example--out of the prison of corsets into a free, flowing tunic.'

'That gruesome thing we used to call 'middle-age' should disappear. Women, if they will, can prove the power of mind over matter.'

When:        7pm on Thursday, May 26
Where:       BookWoman bookstore, 5501 N Lamar, Austin
Cost:          Free!

(Please share this post to help spread the word.)

Like many summa cum laude graduates, I started my career with confidence in my talents and abilities. So much so that I refused to get involved in anything that smacked of "office politics." I believed that work and career were all about merit, not about backroom bartering or Happy Hour schmoozing. Today I look back at my younger self with amusement and affection, recognizing that what she considered integrity was actually a tangle of naiveté and arrogance.

Oh, how I wish Linda A. Hill and Kent Lineback had been around to set me straight.

In their new book, Being the Boss: The 3 Imperatives for Becoming a Great Leader, Harvard business prof Hill and business exec Lineback make an argument for office politics to which even the indignant Dr. Daly would have conceded. Here's how I imagine such a conversation might have gone:

Q: Office politics are a waste of my time, and I don't want to deal with them. Why should I bother?

A: Well, for one thing, your organization, like all organizations, is inherently political. Where there are people, there are power relations. If you ignore that reality, you'll miss out on an essential tool you need to get your work and your team's work accomplished--because your ability to obtain necessary resources often depends upon the intelligence you gather and the partnerships you've established. Even more, you'll miss out on the opportunity to influence (read: lead) the direction of your organization.

Q: But what about that old saying, "power corrupts"?

A: In fact, powerlessness corrupts just as well. Because if you have no power or influence, you can't stand up for what you believe is right. You end up saying, "They made me do it."

Q: So office politics aren't just about screwing people over for your own gain?

A: Sure, there are those people who get off on the game for their own dark reasons, but don't throw out the baby with the bath water. Office politics, when you break them down, are fundamentally about building bridges and making allies in order to get things accomplished.

Q: I get things accomplished just fine, thank you.

A: Right now you may be able to get things done on your own. But as your career develops and you begin to manage a project or a team beyond your own tasks, you'll need other people to buy in and lend a hand.

Q: OK, I think I can see your point. So how do I go about building all these bridges and making all these allies without wasting most of my work day? Please don't tell me I have to "network."

A: We're not going to tell you to "network," but we are going to suggest that you build networks. Three networks, to be precise. Your operational network consists of the people who will help you and your team get the job done on a daily basis. Your strategic network consists of the people who will help you prepare for the future by scanning the wider environment for opportunities and threats. Your developmental network consists of the people who will help you to grow and develop.

Q: Why do I need colleagues to help me grow and develop? I'm a great learner!

A: Here's why: Who you know determines what you get to do, and what you get to do determines what you get to know. Competence and expertise are not developed in isolation. They are developed through interactions with others.

Q: I never thought of it that way. But what am I supposed to do, go up to someone and ask her, "Will you be my mentor?"

A: Well, that's probably not going to work all that well. Here's a three-part process that will get you better results. First, clarify where you are and where you're trying to go. (And by "you," we mean the collective "you," as in you-and-your-team.) Second, identify those people who can help you get there. Third, create opportunities to meet those people, even if it means volunteering for the task force that would otherwise send you running in the opposite direction.

Q: Ugh.

A: You can't win if you don't play, and you can't build relationships without leaving your desk. You need to let people know what you stand for before there's a crisis that you need to confront together. Build your credibility and trustworthiness in advance. So think of that task force as an investment in your team and in your career.

Q: I don't know. I'm still not sure I can go up against that guy who's been sharpening his game for years.

A: You don't have to go up against him. But you can neutralize him. And the only way to neutralize that guy is to accumulate political capital of your own.

Q: Well, I would like to neutralize that guy. Actually, I'd love to vaporize him.

(For more career coaching, sign up for my free eletter.)

One of the issues that comes up most frequently with my coaching clients, no matter where they are on their career trajectory, is communicating accomplishments. They fear that, if they do "toot their own horn," as my mother used to say, there will be a backlash against what is perceived as brazen ego. But they also know that, if they don't, they risk being left behind as others advance in the organization. It's just one manifestation of the double bind that women face in the workplace.

For a little more insight, I asked Gail Evans about this unwritten "don't tell, don't tell" policy. Evans was a pioneering executive in television journalism who now writes and speaks about women in the workplace. The author of Play Like a Man, Win Like a Woman and She Wins, You Win, she will be speaking in Austin on Monday, May 9, at IBM, 11501 Burnet Road. Sponsored by Texas State University, IBM, and Maxwell, Locke & Ritter LLP, her talk is open to the public. Tickets ($25) are still available. Click here for more details.

Here's what Gail advises:

Women tend to think that when they tell someone the truth about their accomplishments that they are boasting and bragging. This starts when we are little children.

Boys are taught that life is about winning and losing and that the best one wins. Boys like to be friends with winners. They associate their friends winning with their own potential for winning. Boys believe that today my friend won and we all celebrate that, but maybe tomorrow I will win.

Girls' friendships are rarely one up or one down. They are much more lateral. Girls are taught that nice girls don't tell others about their accomplishments. Girls are frequently taught how to be good losers, and boys are taught how to be good winners. Girls' relationships are among equals.

For little girls, it's about maintaining the friendship and keeping the game going. For boys it's about winning and losing.

When girls grow up, they maintain that belief that nice girls are self deprecating about their achievements. Boys learn that, if you don't tell someone about your accomplishments, no one will know. They are clear that they are their own best PR person. Women need to switch from worrying about appearing pushy, braggy, or tooting their own horn to becoming their own PR agent. When we think about doing our own PR, we can be much more subtle in our language and promote ourselves without worrying that other women are going to judge us.

The only saving grace about my Dancers Shape barre class is that it doesn't start until 9:30am. I can sleep in a wee bit and slide into full consciousness at a reasonable pace. Because there is nothing reasonable about the paces that Jennifer McCamish puts us through. . . But that's exactly why we all show up.

I added the Dancers Shape barre class to my pilates routine a few months ago, as a way to up the ante. The ante still has a way to ascend, but I return every Tuesday. Because someday I'm gonna get through the entire hour. And those ten gazillion butt lifts.

Sweet Jennifer, she's encouraging and exacting. And she's a former student of mine from UT! There is, for sure, a karmic thing going on. I'm sure that my dance history and criticism classes seemed something of a relentless bootcamp themselves.

After earning her BA in Dance from UT-Austin, Jennifer headed for London, Los Angeles, New Orleans, and New York, where she danced professionally for 13 years--as a Radio City Rockette! (Man, I'm feeling old.) Now, with extensive training in injury prevention, personal training, and Stott Pilates®, she has opened up her own Dancers Shape studio back here in Austin, at 5350 Burnet Rd, # 7.

Jennifer is one powerful woman, so I asked her to share her thoughts about women and power:

How do you define power?

Accomplishing goals and dreams gracefully through a positive attitude and thought process, that is power. The mind is full of energy and I have experienced how strong and productive or weak that energy can make you. Believing in yourself and not fearing failure builds courage and allows you to take big risks and to go for your dreams, even when others doubt your abilities. Being afraid of failing holds you back from experiences that can help you grow into a powerful individual. You have to experience failure in order to know you are pushing yourself in life. The amount of strength it takes to pick yourself back up from a failed experience and turn it into a positive learning experience is invaluable for building a powerful you.

Why is it important for women to embrace power?

Everyone should embrace all their potential power so they can take more control of their future and change any thoughts or predetermined paths with which they might not be totally satisfied.

When do you feel most powerful?

I feel powerful when I make dreams become a reality. This is never an easy task, so when the hard work and focus pay off it is a feeling that can't be touched. Not only do I get this feeling with my own dreams but also when I know I have touched a client's life. When I work with people who have physical limitations, many times these limitations have to do with their mind set, not believing they can improve because of their age or an old injury. With a gentle approach, we start to build strength and flexibility back in a weak area. When the client starts to feel or see the change, I see the mind begin to think in a different way. They begin to feel like they can get to a place they previously didn't believe was possible. This makes me feel very powerful, knowing I had a part in helping someone change their body, but more importantly their mind.

Who are some powerful women you admire and why?

Professional dancers such as my Radio City Rockette and American Ballet Theatre friends. In the professional dance world there were many women who performed into their mid-40s. You never could tell how old they were because they took such great care of themselves and had a love for life that was infectious. I watched many of them recover from injuries and have babies later than most women, and still come back and dance on the most famous stages in NYC. It was inspiring to see their grace and beauty through their positive attitudes, which allowed them to recover and overcome physical obstacles in their bodies. These role models helped motivate me after my own hip surgery to make sure I had a full recovery and to step back onto the professional dance stage after a six-year dance hiatus.

How does the Dancers Shape barre program optimize women's physical power?

The Dancers Shape barre program optimizes women's physical power because it is based on the scientific approach of overloading the muscles to the point of fatigue--the most efficient way to break through training thresholds to see and feel improved muscle tone and strength. Quick results don't come for free, however. That means the class is very challenging, and you have to have that strong mind and will power that you can complete the class, you will improve and gain strength, and you can finish those last three reps that your body feels are impossible.

Further thoughts on my quest for physical power:
"At 50, a Pilates Do-Over!"
"Vlada, the Warrior Pilates Instructor"